*Ahem* Okay, so it's been a while. Again. I hope this doesn't become the norm. Yes, he called. And we talked. And he called again. And we spoke some more. I called him last night. And we're going out this evening. If my friens ever find out about this, they will murder me! Hah, that's probably why I'm procrastinating telling them. In fact, just to make things easier, I haven't called anyone I'm supposed to. Yeah, yeah, I know if I feel I have to hide something like this, it probably isn't right. But I've spent so much time feeling dead...and for the first time, I feel alive! This is going to sound really cheesy, but he makes me want to experience life and try new things again. Like that Evanescent song:
How can you see into my eyes
Like open doors.
Leading you down into my core
Where I’ve become so numb.
Without a soul
My spirit’s sleeping somewhere cold
Until you find it there and lead it back home.
(wake me up.
Wake me up inside.
I can’t wake up.
Wake me up inside.
Save me.
Call my name and save me from the dark.
Wake me up.
Bid my blood to run.
I can’t wake up.
Before I come undone.
Save me.
Save me from the nothing I’ve become.)
Now that I know what I’m without
You can’t just leave me.
Breathe into me and make me real
Bring me to life.
I'm not in love again. I don't really think I'm capable of that so soon. But I promise I'll write in excrutiating detail all that transpires on our *chokes* date tonight. Unless it's romantic. And then I'll pretend this whole thing NEVER happened. I don't have the patience for romance.
Enough talk about that particular aspect of my life *coughs* Oh and disregard my previous post...I don't think I've sounded that juvenile since I was thirteen. Geezus, you'd think he was Brad Pitt or something.
I wanted to talk about the DBZ fandom (and I did talk about it the first time I posted this...speaking of which, I'm going to quick save) but now I don't feel like it. Life's too short to depress yourself with that kind of stuff, ya know? I've just got to let it run off, like water off a duck.
But I do want to say this...for myself I guess since I'm the only one who reads this:
Life's not just about surrounding yourself with people you love/respect/like, whatever. It's about learning to live with those who'd gladly piss on your grave if given the chance, and all the ones in between. And so that's why I am delcaring myself neutral...er to a certain degree. If any of my friends need me, I'll hop off the fence I'm currently straddling and be on their side in a heart beat.
On that note, I'm going to start getting ready for my *chokes* date. I promise to post the details tomorrow...or if a lot of exciting stuff happens, I'll do it immediately afterward.
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